Thursday, February 23, 2017

Isaac and his two front teeth

Its hard to imagine how much little kids play with loose teeth.  If they weren't all doing it, it would be some kind of pathology.  Isaac plays with his loose teeth almost as much as he breathes.  And like a lot of kids he is worryfascinated by them.  We get a constant update: its loose, no really loose.  And then there are displays of looseness--he wiggles the tooth around with his tongue and his fingers.  And finally there are the reports--its bleeding, its twisted, I think it is falling out.  The only thing that ends all of this is when the tooth does, in fact, actually fall out. 

This most recent time was the first I was with Isaac when it happened. I picked him up from after school and he told me, of course, the tooth was loose.  I looked and it was very loose.  In fact, the tooth was no longer attached on the right side, just the left side.  It was really quite gross.  But it wasn't bleeding and he didn't want to yank it (and really, I can't blame him, I had a loose tooth yanked once and it was not fun).

We were in store when all of a sudden Isaac got very quiet.  Eerily quiet.  I sat Beethan down and looked across the store and I saw him holding something in his hand.  And then he looked up, and just like that Isaac was missing his tooth.  The two front teeth are now gone.  He beamed with pride and I was shocked at just how cute he looked.  He is growing up and it is wonderful to get to watch it happen. 

And now he has moved on to yet another loose tooth.  But this one seems like it is a month or two away.  Daily reports have already started to come in. 

Saturday, February 18, 2017

My Tiny Chocolates, Part II

After the tremendous success of the original, a sequel was inevitable.  Ethan loves telling people about his tiny chocolates.  But now, everything has come to fit into the "my tiny...." formula.  First there was Ethan's tiny chocolates, then his tiny spoon, his tiny cups, his tiny shoes, his tiny belly, and one on occasion, his tiny poop (which was distinctly not tiny).  

Its become so pervasive that even his friends at school know that things are "Ethan's tiny X."  One of his friends, George, went home and told his mom that his shoes were Ethan's shoes.  They didn't understand until, at some point, George told his mother "Ethan's tiny shoes."  When she approached Bianca, Bianca explained it all and its clear--the entire world is Ethan's tiny something.

Saturday, February 4, 2017

Teacher Isaac

As we start the second year of karate with Isaac, he has progressed at a rapid pace.  He was pretty uncoordinated when we started and now he is performing complex moves with ease.  As he has gotten more focused, he has also noticed that he has new abilities, like additional strength and flexibility.  His favorite parlor trick is to perform an almost perfect splits in blue jeans.  The kid is a flexible little gumbi.  But the thing that he was most excited about getting a chance to try out was being a helper/teacher for the little kids (there are kids as young as 3 at Isaac's karate studio).  

And this past Saturday he finally got his wish.  We arrived early, 15 minutes before the little kids class started and he got to go out to the teacher huddle where they talked about what they would be doing that class.  

Then after that he got to stand at the front of the class and helped other kids with their forms and techniques.  He walked around and spread encouragement, which was absolutely adorable.  He also did a lot of clapping and cheering as the little kids rolled, tumbled, and bumbled through their kicks and punches.  

Overall, I was very impressed.  He was, of course, super serious and very, very kind.  It was a big step and one I think Isaac really enjoyed.  Its the first time he has ever been teaching other people and I think he realizes just how awesome a responsibility and opportunity that is.  

Monday, January 23, 2017

My Tiny Chocolates

Ethan loves chocolate.  It was probably one of the first twenty words he could say.  And he really really loves those tiny peanut butter cups from Trader Joes.  And so do I.  So when we had them last I would tease him (to both our delights) telling him they were "My Tiny Chocolates."  Well, he return the favor and would regularly grab them, whip away from me, and say in a loud and scary voice (or as loud and scary as a nearly two year old gets): MY TINY CHOCOLATES.

I would say this to him even after we had eaten all of the peanut butter cups.  My fear was that he didn't like it, but just gave me a reaction to give me reaction.  Then, two weeks after the chocolate cups were gone for no reason at all, he yelled at me at dinner: MY TINY CHOCOLATES!  And then he let out a huge giggle.  It was clear that he understood how to tease me and thus it is really his first joke.  Bianca, Isaac, and I howled with laughter which only made Ethan do it more and more.

Since then I was see him or he will catch my eye and we both let out a loud, rumbly "MY TINY CHOCOLATES!"  Here is a cute little video of the Beeth and I with our routine:

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Return of the Tiny Potties

Bianca and I decided that as 2017 dawned that we'd start the long, messy process of potty training the Beethan.  And so, for the last time, the tiny potties have returned to our bathrooms.  Eventually we will move them to places Beethan prefers, but for now, they are going to be in the bathrooms.  

We have the whole range of things to roll out slowly so that Beeth gets ready--applause, potty books, the "Poop on Your Potty" song (which I made up and isn't all that complicated), and lots of encouragement.   The thing that strikes me as so odd is that this whole thing is a shift in labor that makes no sense from Ethan's point of view.  We do a good job keeping him in clean diapers and monitoring rashes, so really, what incentive does he have to assume a lifetime of work?  None, really.  We will, of course, bribe him, probably with toys or maybe food, but in the end, those remunerations are tiny in comparison to the amount of free labor that we get to pawn off on him.  Imagine the 10-20 minutes a day spent attending to diapers--changes, storage, and disposal--now add that up over 18 years, and it seems like outright theft that we persuade Ethan to do this with what will end up being a couple of Hot Wheels.  

This is the power of wanting to be a big boy, of wanting to be like "brudder," and in the end, of wanting to be independent.  It is a fascinating process, one that eventually leads to college and the like, and it all starts with a tiny potty.

Monday, January 9, 2017

Isaac Non Sequiturs

Non sequitur is Latin for "it does not follow."  In logic it means that there is a gap in reasoning, that one statement does not follow from the preceding statements.  And as Isaac's Dad, sometimes I am left scratching my head by his non sequiturs.  Here are a few recent ones:

"I want to be bald."

He said this and Bianca and I instantly looked at each other in bewilderment.  After a day or two we figured it was because one of his favorite characters, Ang from the Avatar the Last Airbender (most underrated TV show in history, FYI) is bald.  He is a pacifist, vegan monk and the hero of a kids show, because you know, that sells toys.  So we thought it was his attempt to be Ang.  And if you look closely you will see that Isaac and Ang look very much alike, but for the hair.




Twins, right?

But alas, no.  We still don't know where that came from.

He then told us that he wanted a gun.  He, like is father, is apparently a big Second Amendment supporter.  And he, like his father, will never get a gun.  Sad.  Finally, he told me one day on the way to school that he had hills, but he wanted mountains.  I looked at him in disbelief and he told he was referring to his muscles.


He is well on his way.

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Swear Word Collector

Sorry for the lack of a Monday post, I was busy half-dying from a stomach bug Ethan gave Isaac, who gave it Bianca, who then gave it to me.  Ugh.  

Anyway, Nanna and P-Pa consider this post a warning.  Isaac has become something of an obsessive swear word collector.  

If you have a kid under 10, you soon realize that TV just doesn't work for them.  The fact that there are commercials, the programs last a half hour at the shortest, and even with on demand, there are limitations to what they can watch, means that TV just stinks.  As these kids get older, it is highly likely that TV as we know it--networks, etc. will just go away for this reason and many others.  The real place for kids to be entertained is YouTube.  But if you a kid YouTube has ready access to one thing TV does not--swear words aplenty.  I deliberately screen all of Isaac's content, but even the most persistent filter will miss few bad words.  Plus, even if I didn't miss them, he'd learn them at school, mainly from his ornery friend Sheamus, who taught him how to flip people off (but didn't tell him what it meant completely, he said it meant the F-word, but Isaac didn't know what that was either).  

The end result is that swear words have become an undiscovered country for Isaac--a place of linguistic power and intrigue.  I am 100% in the I could care less camp about swear words, but the rest of society is not and so, with Bianca's urging, we have tried like China (and in vain) to limit his exposure to swear words.  But every time someone says a word he doesn't know with any sort of vigor he thinks it is a swear word ("Astounding!").  Probably once every 15 minutes he is away I get asked if something is a swear word.  And when something is bleeped out, he sits there and tries to figure out the rest of the world for phrase.  Right now he is puzzling through the two "P" swear words.  He figured out piss, but the other, female related term, still eludes him.  But like a true collector, he will not give up.  I can't imagine the joy he would feel if he heard George Carlin's rife on the Seven Words You Can't Say on TV.